I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
and you fell through a lawn chair
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
