Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
