He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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