Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
