Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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