make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
