ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
