Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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