What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
