i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
