i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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