I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
