I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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