got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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