I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
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