could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
