You're a womanizer and a bitch.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
