You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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