so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
