it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
