Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize