We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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