So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
