i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
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