check it out our google latitudes are spooning
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
