i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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