So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I will die if light touches me.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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