somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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