if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Randomize
