and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
