I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
You're completely useless in the revolution.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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