i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
