I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize