my soul wont recognize me after tonight
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
