I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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