these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
