On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
nutella sex= disaster
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
