Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
