I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I enjoy the company of your penis
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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