oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
