I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Come share oat with me in your robe
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
