We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
