My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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