these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
