if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize