meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
