ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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