I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I did not marry a roomba.
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