is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
