i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
