I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Quick, to the slutcave!
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
