Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
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