I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize