So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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