Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
